Promises Unwanted
by littlemissgiggles
Summary: This is my first ff. Sleep is there for rest, dreams are their for comfort, or are they? Lily doesnt no what shes up against. Y is she so tired and whats up with
1. The train ride

Lily Evans put the rest of her stuff on the trolley and made her way to platform nine and three-quarters. This was her fifth year at Hogwarts of Witchcraft and Wizardry and was still going to be the same. 

Lily was not the most popular girl in school but not an outcast either, she was wedged in the middle just the way she liked it. After five years at the school she had soon learned that nothing would ever change and she would always be good old lily . 

Not that Lily didn't have any friends, infact quite the opposite, you would never see her on her own except when she was in the library. That was part of the problem, she liked to read and was really quite a quiet girl, if it wasn't for that she would be the most popular girl in school. She had friends from Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, Griffindor and even Slytherin, they hated anyone who even spoke to a Griffindor let alone a Griffindor itself and a muggle-born at that. There was just something about Lily that gave people the impression that she would be a great friend and there when you need her. It might of been because of her kind nature or the fact that she would always listen, no one knows. But she was always true to her word and would never let anyone down.

"Hey girl, how was your summer?" travelled over the busy bodies trying to get past the barrier without being too obvious to the various muggles around.

Lily turned to see a chubby looking girl who she recognised as her best friend.

"Hey Karen, not too bad, well if you don't count Petunia's continuous whining, how was yours?"

"Great." Karen replied enthusiastically

" Was she really that bad?, you should of hexed her Lily, i would of, how can you put up with that horse-faced bitch."

Lily had to laugh at that, Petunia did resemble a horse, from her squared faced shape to her dirty blond hair, and the worst of it was the fact she thought she was pretty.

Hearing this cheery voice again put all of Lily's troubles behind her. Soon she would be on the Hogwarts express and on her way to Hogwarts. Leaving all her problems behind her and forget about them. If only it was that simple.

Lily grabbed Karen's arm and they both made a run through the barrier, time seemed to slow down as they were pulled through and now standing at the Howarts Express station.

This sight still seemed to amaze Lily, she had seen and been here for nearly 4 years but it was still like she was seeing it for the first time. Children were running around trying to haul their trunks and cages onto the train. Mothers and Fathers were saying goodbye and waving their children off, whether it was their first year or last. The bright red steam engine was pulled up at the station and was the best thing Lily had seen all summer. This transport would take her to her home, her real home where she belonged.

"Lily come on, you're like this every year, if any one was to see you they would think that you had never seen it before." Shouted Karen

"All right I'm sorry, I'm coming."

"I just gotta say bye to my parents kay? you go get us a compartment before they all go." 

With that Karen ran off in the direction of her parents and Lily was left to struggle with her trunk and cat carrier.

Finding and empty compartment was easy as most of the students were still saying goodbye and making last arrangements about the holidays. Pulling her trunk in she left it in the middle of the floor and walked to the back of the small carriage. 

Setting her cage down she opened it and out came a very sleepy cat. Lily sat down next to it and curled up ready to go to sleep. The grey fluff ball walked up to her and settled down on her lap ready to fall asleep again.

"Your tired too aint you Ballou, seems like neither of us got much rest this holiday hey."

The sleepy cat turned his big ornage eyes on Lily as if he understood her and then went back to the curled form on her lap. Lily sighed and pulled her legs up closer making sure as to not to disturb Ballou.

She looked out the passenger window to see Karen saying goodbye to her parents. How she wished that her Mother could see her now. Her mum had died when she was 2 from an illness that the doctors couldn't name. Ever since then her Dad had been drifting further and further away and now never left the house unless of an emergency, he was stuck at he desk all day writing more to his novel that he started the day after mum passed away. And Petunia wasn't any help either. She called Lily a freak every day and would beat and kick her when dad wasn't looking which was often. And she had been getting weird notes from.......

Lily was so court up in her thoughts that she didn't notice the compartment door open and close or the fact that they had left the station and Karen hadn't come in yet. A rough hand on her shoulder pushed all thoughts from her head and all she could do was stare and look at the new comer.

"Malfoy what are you doing in here?"

Lily was friends with loads of people but not everyone and did have an enemy here and there.

"Why Lily, i came here looking for you, you know i haven't seen you in a while and i wanted to see what was happening ." Lucias Malfoy replied smirking.

His blond hair was slicked back and his icy blue eyes never leaving her face.

Lily was nervous, Malfoy never came to speak to any Griffindors unless he was after something. What was he after? she had nothing that he wanted, and yet he didn't look like he was planning on going in a hurry.

Lucias sat down next to Lily and turned her to face him. He was a year above Lily and was extremely strong for a 6 year. Taking hold of her chin he tilted her head back until it was against the window, her back now pushed against the side of the seat. Ballou jumped from her lap and ran to the other end of the compartment and started scratching at the door, in hope that someone was out there to help, he was really and extraordinary cat and new when his owner was in trouble.

Lily was beyond nervousness now and was starting to panick, what was Malfoy up to?

" What do you want with me, i haven't done anything to you?"

Lucias tilted his head back and laugh, a laugh full of cruelty and pain, not o laugh for happiness like it should of been.

"Now Lily what makes you think that i want something from you, i am merely being friendly. Unless you want to give me something, that would be very much appreciated."

Lucias was looking Lily up and down stopping at her chest (AN: he is a 16 year old boy what do u expect.)

Lily cringed under his penetrating eyes and started to wriggle her way form under him, but that just made him laugh even harder.

" Don't be like that, i just want to prove a point that you now bel..........."

He never got to finish he sentence as neither of them noticed that the compartment door was wide open with a very red faced girl with a group of people behind her. Malfoy was yanked off Lily hard and thrown across the room.

"What the hell do you think your doing, gets out of here now Malfoy while you have the chance."

With that Lily's hero turned back to her, blue eyes staring into Lily's green ones. 

Lucias new he was out numbered and sprinted out the door but not before whispering so only Lily could her him.

"I'll be back Lily Evans you can count on it."

AN: who is lily's hero and no it is probably not who u think, you'll have to read and review to find out more. Oh and sorry if i miss spelt any names please tell me if i have. I will not continue unless i get at least 2 reviews. Even is u think its crap please just say so.


	2. The new boy

Lily's green eyes were still locked with the mysterious blue eyes in front of her. She was now shaking with fear, remembering what just happened and Lucius threat. Why was he doing this to her? 

Still not turning her head from the stranger in front of her she could hear people whispering behind her wondering what had just happened, the blue eyes seemed to go into her soul, finding out everything about her. Then the eyes left her face and raked all over her, it wasn't the sort of penetrating eyes like Lucius's that made her nervous but left a warm tingling feeling in its place. Finding her voice again Lily spoke, her voice still croaky but getting more and more relaxed.

"Um thanks for getting rid of Malfoy for me, i don't mean to be rude but i haven't seen you around before, are you new?"

The strangers face broke into a grin and Lily was breath taken. She tore her eyes away from the electric blue ones and took in the high cheekbones and short brown hair. He was the most gorgeous guy she had ever seen. She had butterflies in her stomach but was feeling much better. The boy stretched out a hand and Lily placed hers in it.

"I can't believe i didn't introduce myself, i am sorry. Yeah i am new i transferred here from America. I'm.........."

The American transfer student never got to finish his sentence, as a high pitched shout came across the crowd of students, everybody parted to let the distressed girl through.

"O my god, Lily are you ok? what did that bastard do to you?"

Karen was nearly crying with worry, her normally warm brown eyes filled with concern for her best friend. She reached over a gave Lily a big hug, then shouting at everyone to go away and leave them alone. The compartment emptied fast and only left two girls standing in the middle.

"I'm fine Karen he didn't do anything, this guy."

Pointing over her shoulder Lily turned round to see the American gone and her face filled with disappointment. She didn't even get his name or say thank you enough for scaring Malfoy away. Karen's eyes filled with concern again when she didn't see anyone.

"Lily what guy? there's no one there, are you sure you're ok?"

"He was there but you had to come in and chase him away, I've already told you that i am fine." snapped Lily

She was shocked that she had shouted like that at Karen and knew that it wasn't Karen's fault but something about that guy made her want to know everything about him. Turning back to Karen she say her friend trying to hold back tears, she had really shocked not just herself but Karen too.

"I'm really sorry Karen i guess im still a little stressed from what happened earlier, i didn't mean to snap at you will you forgive me?" Lily said apologetically

Karen's face immediately softened when she remembered what had just happened to Lily, her eyes filling with concern again.

"Lily what happened, i couldn't find you anywhere on the train and was starting to panic when i saw everyone crowded round here, what guy are you talking about?"

Lily frowned and wasn't sure how to tell Karen what happened. Karen was a great friend but was kind of a loud mouth when it came to gossip, but then again everyone would know about him at the feast if he was a new student.

"Well Malfoy you could say was being a bit too friendly and the new American student chucked him out, but i never got his name."

Karen started smiling and sat down on Lily's trunk which was still in the middle of the carriage.

"Yeah i've seen him, he's the one with the gorgeous blue eyes, have you ever seen anyone like that, he is major hunkage."

Karen said laughing. When she got a crush she wouldn't stop talking all day, Lily just hoped that this wouldn't be one of those days, she never did get any sleep and was chattered.

" We will be arriving at Hogwarts in 5 minutes." the announcer said over the intercom.

"God Lily come on we haven't got are robes on lets get changed."

Karen rushed over to her trunk that was in the doorway and pulled out her robe. Coming back in she got changed and put all her muggle clothes back into the trunk. Lily just pulled her robe over her clothes and decided to change later. Then Lily remembered that Ballou was still out but couldn't find him anywhere.

"Hey Karen have you seen Ballou, he was here earlier."

Karen thought for a minute and then shook her head.

"No i haven't seen him since we left the station."

Lily was starting to panic, she hadn't seen Ballou since Malfoy came in, where could he be? He knew not to run off, she looked up and down the compartment once more and still couldn't find him anywhere.

"Ballou come here boy." Lily shouted down the corridor in hope that he would be there. She heard this soft meow and looked harder down the corridor, the compartment at the end was open and out came a pink and green cat.

Lily recognised it immediately as Ballou. She ran up to him and picked him up carrying him back to their compartment.

"What happened to you Ballou, who did this, i bet it was Potters group, ahhh i hate them why do they have to pick on me all the time?"

Karen turned when Lily entered and burst out laughing as soon as she saw the colourful cat in her arms. He was now orange and blue with dots of yellow.

"It's not funny Karen, if i find out that Potter did this i will really kill him, good job i know charms otherwise this would be impossible."

With that Lily took out her wand and pointed it and the now red and silver cat.

"Reperio"

Nothing happened at first and Lily thought that she must of done it wrong and was just about to say it again when the small cat turned a dark grey. Smiling with herself she pocketed her wand and put Ballou back in his cage.

Karen was still laughing silently and Lily shot her a warning look.

"Come on Lily you have to admit that it was funny."

The express stopped and both of them hopped off and made their way to the small carriages waiting to take them up to Hogwarts. Lily heard the familiar voice of a Hagrid near the water.

"First years, any first years this way."

Lily waved towards him and the giant waved a big hand back smiling.

"Hello Lily, i ope that you av a nice yer."

"Thanks Hagrid, i have to go now but i'll come and visit you at ur hut okay?"

"Yeh sur Lily, bya"

Hagrid turned back to all the first years and Lily headed in the direction of the carriage that Karen had gone to. 

Lily found Karen inside with 3 other 5th year girls all of which were in their dorm room. Putting her trunk down and letting Ballou out she went to sit next to them.

"Hi Jules, Jenna and Kait how was your summer guys?"

"Great" they all replied

"Karen told us what happened to Ballou, it couldn't of been Potter and his group they aren't good at charms to be able to do that." Jenna said laughing, pushing her long blond hair behind her shoulders.

"Well Remus is but he's too sweet to do that." Kait giggled.

All of them had a crush on at least one person out of Potters group except for Lily and Jenna.

"Oh come on Remus is as bad as them when it comes to pranks." said Lily angrily

She hated it when her friends stuck up for Potters group, all of them were as bad as each other.

"But i have to admit that it couldn't of been them unless they actually study over the holidays but the day that happens is the day i fall in love with Potter." Lily continued bursting out laughing. Everyone knew that Lily absolutely hated James, when they weren't at each other's throats they could have a descent convasation but would never admit to it. The rest of the group started laughing too and soon they were falling on the floor in hysterics. 

Lily straightened up and tried to control here laughter like the others. But they found it too hard and ended up on the floor again.

"Hey (hiccup) have any of you seen (hiccup) seen the new guy." Karen said giggling.

"Yeah he's really cute do any of you know what year he's in?" Jules said calming down a bit. They all shook their heads and sat back down. The carriage then came to a stop and they all climbed out leaving their trunks in there for the house elves to take to their dorms. Lily didn't want to leave Ballou but had to put him back in his cage saying goodbye.

The girls all made there way to the great hall and were amazed with how good it looked. The enchanted ceiling was a deep blue with loads of twinkling silver stars. Red and gold surrounded the Gryffindor table, Green and sliver was all around the Slytherin table, yellow and black covered the Hufflepuff table and blue was over the Ravenclaw table.(AN:i just guessed hufflepuff and Ravenclaw so if u now what the real colours our please tell me) They all headed over to the Gryffindor table and found seats near the end so they wouldn't be bothered with little chat by others around them.

Lily loved the sorting and couldn't wait for it to start. Professor McGonagall placed a stool in the middle of the hall and put a tattered looking hat on top of it. Just before it started to sing Lily felt eyes boreing into the back of her head. Turning round towards the Slytheirn table she spotted Lucius Malfoy staring her way. Shuddering Lily looked away to see Karen giving her a questioning look. Lily shook her head and mouthed the words 'i'll tell you later'

Looking back at the sorting hat she realised that she had missed its song and first years had already began to be sorted. Great so now she had missed the best bit all cause of Malfoy. Forgetting all about that Lily tried to concentrate on the sorting. 2 people had already been sorted into Hufflepuff, 5 in Ravencalw, 3 in Slytherin and 6 in Gryffindor, Lily clapped along with the rest of Gryffindor when someone joined their house. Turning back to the teachers table she saw Dumbledore rise and look around the hall.

" I would like to announce that we have an exchange student from America, please try to make him feel as welcome as possible, he will be joining in Gryffindor as a year 5."

Through the hall doors came the guy from the train. He had his robes on and made his way to Dumbledore. Looking over all the students he stopped at the Gryffindor and spotted Lily and his face broke into the same adorable grin. All the girls around the hall sighed and the guys just looked on with envy in their eyes. All except James Potter, Sirius Black and Remus Lupin, they had identical grins on their face as the new guy and were putting their thumbs up like the idiots they were.

Laughing again the exchange student turned to the rest of the hall and raised his voice.

"Hi, i would like to say that it is an honour to be here and i hope that i enjoy this school as much as i would like to. My name is Peter Pettigrew but please just call me Pete, if i here any one say the name Peter i will personally see to it that they never here that name ever again." Pete joked and looked toward Potter's group.

With that he walked off to the Gryffindor table sitting down next to James but not before looking up straight at Lily. Smiling to himself he went back to talking with the most popular group in school.

AN: dont kill me, this is my story and i will write it the way i want it. Again if i have done any mistakes and you would like me to correct them please tell me. I will not continue with the story if i dont get at least 5 more reviews then what i have which is 12. So when i get17 reviews i will tell you more. And it will get interesting. Oh and i am crap with chapter titles so if anyone has any ideas please tell me. Thanks for all the reviews it really helped.


	3. Truth revealed Part 1

PROMISES UNWANTED

Truth revealed Part 1

AN: I have a couple of points to make. 1. I am sooooooo sorry that this is so late. I was ill and then i had loads of work to do so please forgive me. 2 I hate Peter too so stop yelling at me. The point is, is that when they were younger they were all really good friends so they must of liked Peter, and they made him their Keeper in the end so they must of trusted him Okay so he's a backstabbing bastard but they must of like him some time to trust him with all their life. And don't say i dont read the books, i do no that Sirius was their Keeper but then they changed to Peter. 3 Um well i cant remember what i was going to say so on with the story.Oh yeah i remember, the title is going to change to UNWANTED DREAMS, its still about the same thing but i have the plot better in my head, also the summary will change but again it will still be about the same thing. I will change the title if i do another chapter.

~*Girls dorm*~

Lily slowly crawled under the covers and drew the curtains around her bed. Everyone was still down stairs in the common room and she could here the loud laughter through the door. She had told everyone that she was tired and used that as an excuse to come upstairs, hopefully when the girls came upstairs they would think she was asleep and leave her alone. Lily knew that she was being ungrateful, not wanting to talk to her friends but she just needed time to think.

" What did everything mean hay Boo, there must be a reason that i feel so tired and wore out."

Lily looked at the cat again and he raised his head slowly, it was weird but he seemed just as wore out and tired as she was. Turning her head away she reached over the edge of her bed and picked up the photo that she had left on her trunk. 

Turning it over she felt tears threatening to fall. The picture had been taken four mouths before her mother got ill. They had gone to the beech and her father had asked one of the tourists passing to take a picture of them together. That was the good days, her mum was holding her while her father had his arm around her shoulder, Petunia was there too holding onto Rose's skirt.

Lily felt her tears spilling over and she let them trickle down her cheek. God she missed her mum, her warm smile, her comforting hugs and words to re-assure her. Yes she had only been two but there was still that ache in her heart to see her again. That was probably the last picture that was taken of them together.

Hearing people start to make a move to go to bed Lily tucked the picture under her pillow and turned her back to the door. It had been twelve years and yet she still hadn't told anyone about her mother's death. She new she was being stupid but she found no reason to talk about it, people would just feel sorry for her and she didn't want that.

One of the last things her mother said to her was for her to be strong and not let anyone see her cry, and she had kept to that promise, at the age of two she didn't really understand her mothers words and yet she still never cried in front of anyone, not when her sister was horrible to her, or when she was bullied at school and the older she got the more she realized how much that promise meant. 

Crying showed you're weak and vulnerable and that was what Lily was not. She had learnt over the years to look after and fend for herself. So no one really noticed how upset and emotional she was inside and that was the way she intended to keep it.

The only suspicious thing was when the Christmas holidays came and each year she never went home even though she supposedly had a loving family, she would just say that she wanted to spend time with her friends and her family understood, but she new in her heart that people wouldn't believe that much longer. Another thing that was hard to cover up was how her parents never came to see her off as a new school year started, each time she would have to think up more excuses luckily no one noticed yet. Her bruises, they were hard to hide. Before coming back to school she would buy special concealer to hide the really noticeable ones. Petunia wasn't one for being fair, it was strange how Petunia and Lily were inseparable when they were younger but Petunia then blamed Lily for their mothers death, a two year old having to have that said to her every day, sometimes Lily actually believed that it was her fault, her father never seemed to notice what was going on and Lily couldn't really blame him, it fell really hard on him but surely he could of noticed the unmistakable marks on Lily's skin.

Soon Lily started to drift of to sleep her eyelids slowly closing over her lively emerald green eyes.

~**The Dream**~

__

She was there again. In the beautiful meadow, the smell of fresh lush grass, the feel of it under her bare feet, soft and cool. The sun over head shining, brightening everything the raise of light met. Poppies lay scattered across the field, daisies dancing in the cool breeze. 

Looking down Lily saw that she had on a beautiful sky blue summer dress, her hair let down to shimmer in the summer sun. No matter how many times she had this dream it always felt fresh and real. But yet it always started the same, although Lily had never been or seen a place quite like it she felt almost at home. 

Looking up she saw blue-tits swooping in and out the full oak tree that lay a few feet away from her, its rich viberant colours twinkling. In front of her she saw that same white house she saw every time. Running Lily passed flower after flower smiling happily for the first time in along while, spreading her arms out as she ran she could feel the light breeze kissing at her skin, when she reached the wonderful house, she stopped. 

Walking slowly closer she could smell the fresh paint, oh how she loved that smell, reaching out her hand she lightly touched the pure white colour and felt the sticky wetness under her fingers, pulling back she looked at her hand and saw the smear of white paint that was left. That was when she heard the small cry, it was like music to her ears, wanting to find out who had called to her she quickly opened the porch door and entered without a care in the world. 

She was shocked to find that the inside looked as new and fresh as the outside had. Listening again she heard the faint sound of someone calling to her, she still couldn't tell what gender but it was so soft that she couldn't resist following it. Roughfully guessing that the sound came from upstairs Lily carefully placed her hand on the banister and started to climb. She could here her feet making soft slaps against the wooden floor. Then again she heard it, only this time it was louder, to the right was where it came from. Walking cautiously not wanting to miss another call, she passed door after door until the sound came right beside her.

Now that she was closer to the person she could tell it was a male's voice but how could it be so soft and caring she had never heard that before in someone's voice. Turning Lily reached for the door nearest to her, her hand gently closed around the knob and was surprised at how cool it felt in her hand. Turning it slowly, inch by inch she started to push the door wider and wider...............

AN: Right thats it for now. I hope u liked it but im not sure if i should continue, so please tell me what u think. Thanks to all the reviews and i hope that from waiting so long this pleases u. Don't worry it does all fit with the story so continue or not continue? that is the question. I need help i dont no what to do so please answer the question. And i hope everyone one and a fantastic Easter i no i did, the only problem no is that there's too much chocolate, but i have plenty of time to eat it. *Hehehehe*


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